Joe Exotic Announces Plans to Open Zoo Down East

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Infamous “Tiger King” Joe Exotic may be sitting in jail, but that’s not stopping him from getting back into the big cat industry.

“Seeing as how my new Netflix docu-series, “Tiger King,” which is named after me, of course, is so hot right now, I thought it was time to share my love for big cats with people on the East Coast,” Exotic said from his Grady County Jail cell in Oklahoma.

Exotic, who was jailed after trying to have another big cat lover, Carole Baskins, murdered, said he plans to open the zoo on Harkers Island.

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“That way if any of them get out of their cages it’s harder for them to go anywhere else,” he said. “Those old bridges are done. It’ll be back to the ferry boat soon enough.”

When this reporter reminded Exotic that NCDOT was currently building a new bridge to the island which is scheduled to be finished in 2024, Exotic replied:

Exotic said that when he gets out of jail, he plans to buy a whole new pride of tigers and ship them to the Morehead City Port “on one of those great, big boats,” then transport them to Harkers Island via CCATS bus.

“I mean, obviously.” he said.

Once on Harkers Island, Exotic said the tigers will be given a brief lesson in Hoi Tider so they can understand when the locals say, “Sehhhn! That thar’s a toiger!”

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That’s not the only new thing the tigers will experience in their new Down East home. Exotic said his cats will have learn to subsist on mullet roe and mosquitoes rather than entire sides of cow.

Construction on the new facility will begin any day now. Exotic has hired a local company to install 165 linear miles worth of chain link fences within chain link fences at the zoo’s new 48-acre site on Island Road.

But, until he’s out of jail, the zoo project will stop there, Exotic said.

Regardless, Exotic is remaining optimistic. The bleach-blonde mullet-rocking zookeeper said he’s sure he will get a presidential pardon “any day now” and can move forward with his plans.

“I trust that justice will show itself. Hopefully as quickly as your readers realized it’s April first and no one in their right mind would let me out of prison early.”